Picturesque Highway

Watching the Hindi movie "Highway". How I wish I could travel like the characters in the movie. Be care free like the character of Alia bhat "Veera" in the movie in spite of all the challenges she had to face through the journey.Travel the paths of life without worrying about the destination, just enjoying the journey. Take life in its stride without worrying about the uncertain future. Be myself, without having to be approved by so many people around. Not having to worry about being judged on my life and my living.

We do so many things every day. Every day, every moment is a new one - philosophically. When I talk so much about these kind of stuffs, you might be wondering whether I believe in what i say - all this philosophy about life and living the moment. Well, I am just starting to believe myself. I have come to realize that believing my own instincts is much safer and satisfying than taking to others opinions. One less norm breaking person is not going to do any harm to this society. Well I agree buying a house and a car and marrying and having kids is good but not the most important thing in my life. If these things can happen as a by product of my day to day happiness then I will be thrilled as others would want me to be.

Ultimately as we always hear, life is too short for regrets. One day suddenly i may die. What is the use of struggling everyday now for attaining 'the position' in this society, the same society which will not even bother to look for me once I am gone. Who really cares for me? All my answers have been reasons to feel better or just a reassurance about what i have believed for so many years. No one will leave this world along with me. Life will continue as it was - minus Malini. No, my grandchildren will not remember my name because i bought a house and a car and they definitely will not miss me.

In my struggle to prove my worth I had forgotten what I really wanted. I had forgotten that I can enjoy the silliest of things in this world. I had forgotten that I enjoy singing, I enjoy eating good food, I enjoy riding my scooty, I enjoy talking, I enjoy looking up to the sky and dreaming, I enjoy reading, I enjoy writing, I enjoy dancing, I enjoy just lying down and doing nothing, I enjoy being a good friend to someone, I enjoy stupid jokes, I enjoy traveling, I enjoy being there for someone when they really need me, I enjoy talking about everything in this world even when I know nothing about it. I enjoy so many things. I had forgotten. This is what I am. How can I forget these and be myself?

A highway of life with its ups and downs but lots of memories that i can carry lightly. This world is large enough that I can find a place for myself. A place where I need not pretend to be someone I am not. A place where I can be happy as I am. Facing the challenges that life will throw at me with my conviction and courage. The end of my journey will be in that place doing my best.

I can go on writing about this topic. It is so so amazing to think about all that i have written. One moment thoughts seem to be flowing out of control and another moment everything is so tranquil. Exhilarating and tiring at the same time. How i wish i could put every signal, every image of my mind as words and phrases here. That's ok. I can feel it and some of it i have been able to transfer here.