Happiness means something different to every individual. You can be happy at various occasions for various reasons. I too had my definition for happiness clearly etched out for myself for a long time. I believed I was happy. Well, someday things had to change and I had to redefine my happiness. An emotional realization of the worth of my time and value had been long impending.
Weekends were crazy for me. I had no time to think about anything other than spending time with my friends. It was either a shopping with a friend or a movie-watching with another friend or a lunch with someone else or just a “hi, how are you” catching up with few others. That was all I could think of during weekends and surprisingly enough I being a person who always likes to take things slow, all the weekends were tiring and major energy drainers for me. So much tiring were the weekends that Monday mornings which were already scary enough became sickening for me. I started dragging myself to work on Mondays pulling the burden of the sleep deprived week ends under my eyes. My colleagues used to wonder what the hell I do on weekends. But I claimed that I was happy. I believed that this is what kept me busy and going.
Then one fine day I met with a small accident. I hurt my leg badly. I had to hop around with one leg for few days. Going to a doctor was by itself a Herculean task and I needed a person’s help to climb up and down the steps to my first floor apartment. My mom had a tough time with me. Every alternate day she would accompany me to hospital for redressing my wound. My neighbors helped me to climb up and down during my first two outings.
That is when I realized how lonely I was if not for my family. Except for couple of my very good friends, none of my busy friends even bothered to call me or inquire upon my absence from their busy lives. Few of them whom I considered very close did not even bother to offer help over a trip to hospital. In all sense, the reality struck me hard.
Although a bit unhappy, I did not worry too much about their unconcern for me. Rather I pondered over the priority I had set up in my life. I realized life had become a mess because of being a "People-Pleaser". For my own good, I re-prioritized. I was not upset anymore. I became much more aware of where I put my time and effort. Even now sometimes I struggle to say a “NO” to a call from a friend. But I have trekked a long way on this path and now I can turn back and not feel worried about my priorities. I have started taking it slow and steady to create happy and healthy relationships that are nurturing and satisfying.
Every time before you say a “YES”, find a reason for not saying a “NO”.
